Happiness vs. Harmony

What does it mean to live a good life?

Your first response to this question might be that a good life is about being happy. This is a reasonable answer and one that most people today take for granted.

But technically, “happiness” is just about having pleasant experiences and positive emotions. While this is certainly an important part of being human, it is nevertheless, only one part—a single instrument in the symphony of life.

Life is incredibly rich and complex. If we value happiness above everything, we will miss out on many of life’s most rewarding and fulfilling experiences, many of which are not necessarily pleasant (i.e. learning something new, cultivating deep relationships, raising a family, etc)

Harmony, on the other hand, is more comprehensive. It includes happiness but also transcends it. It’s about expressing the many different aspects of our nature in balanced and adaptive ways. It’s about honoring our diverse and competing needs and values. For example:

  • Our need to express our individuality but also our need to be part of a group.

  • Our need to explore and experiment but also our need to feel safe and secure.

  • Our need to enjoy life but also our need to deal with its inevitable difficulties.

In other words, harmony is about honoring two sets of opposing needs: on one hand, our need for growth and change and on the other hand, our need for stability and certainty.

In the same way that different notes and instruments can be played together to produce a beautifully layered and cohesive piece of music, the interplay of our diverse and conflicting needs and values produces a rich and fulfilling life—both individually and collectively.

In short, a good life is not just about happiness, it’s about harmony. If we’re honest with ourselves, I think we’ll realize that this is really what we’re after.

P.S. Yes, I’m trying to bring back the classical idea of eudaimonia. Help spread the word!